Summertime

The end of summer brings back a lot of memories of Cathy for me.

Right about know she would be taking her summer holidays, touring her favourite galleries and riding Toronto’s bike trails in her favourite bikini top.

Her phone calls would come in: “c’monnnnn…let’s go do something fun!” “Let’s go for a bike ride!” or “Whoohoo! Lets go for a drink on a patio!”

Right about know she would also be planning her TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival) experience for the year. What films would she see, which celebs would be in town, and which gala’s did I think Scott would get us in to?

This photo reminds me of Cathy on her summer holidays. I think it was taken on the Wolfe Island Ferry, probably in the mid to late 90s, and probably as she was heading over to Wolfe Island to for a bike ride. Sun, water, and bike riding...three of her favourite things.

One Year

Tomorrow will be the one year anniversary of the creation of this blog. It was originally created to share the progress of Cathy's recovery with friends and family. I can honestly say that, at that time, I thought she would fully recover, and we'd have the old Cathy back.

What a difference a year makes. Or a month. Or a day. Life goes by fast. Death comes quickly.

Cathy had her major surgery around this time about a year ago. It was a scary time, and I realize now that we never really knew how scary the results actually were. She did not want people to know the specific details of her "recovery", as she did not want people to worry.

We were only allowed to reveal so much on this blog. If you look back at the posts, there is always a cautious optimism in the tone. I think we were willing ourselves to think positively, that everything would be OK.

But life marches on, with no pause for those it's left behind. We've all gone more or less back to our daily routines. But it is never easy. I'll find myself staring into the mirror in the morning asking, "WTF - did this really happen?"

It's interesting to me that this blog still gets traffic. Quite a few visitors a week, actually. So I will keep it going, as it obviously serves some kind of purpose, if only for the selfish reason that it helps keep me sane.

I've put back smiling Cathy, as that's how we ultimately remember her. And I've updated the look from it's funereal theme of the past few months. Grief will come and go, but our happy memories, the recall of her laughter, will always be there.

Thanks for hearing me out, whoever is out there.

Birthdays & Festivals

Today Cathy would have turned 46 1/2. Yes, she was one of the few people around who celebrated their Half Birthday, if only to give everyone six months notice that her real birthday was coming up.

We are also thinking about Cathy today as the Toronto International Film Festival begins tonight. That these two momentous ocassions are colliding on the same date would have been a great delight to her.

TIFF was clearly one of her most favourite times of the year. A lot of us have great memories of attending films with her, or just stalking...er...hanging out in Yorkville hoping to catch a glimpse of one of her favourite celebrities.

If anyone goes to TIFF this year, let's leave an extra seat for Cathy.

Memorial Photos Now Posted

View them here:

Thank You

Thank you to everyone who participated in and contributed to last evening's memorial. The general consensus is that it is just what Catherine would have wanted. We will be posting photos from the event next week to the blog. In the meantime, many have asked about the closing poem. I have posted it below:

Death is nothing at all.
I have only slipped away to the next room.
I am I and you are you.
Whatever we were to each other,
That, we still are.

Call me by my old familiar name.
Speak to me in the easy way
which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed
at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me. Pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word
that it always was.
Let it be spoken without effect.
Without the trace of a shadow on it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same that it ever was.
There is absolute unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind
because I am out of sight?

I am but waiting for you.
For an interval.
Somewhere. Very near.
Just around the corner.

All is well.

- Henry Scott Holland

Remembering Catherine: A Celebration

Details are now confirmed for the AGO memorial for Catherine. The event will take place on Thursday, July 22 at 6 p.m. in the Galleria Italia at the Art Gallery of Ontario. There will be music, some of Catherine's artwork, and the sharing of happy memories of our dear friend. Those attending just need to show up at the main entrance to the AGO, and you will be escorted to the Galleria.

Following the memorial, a reception will be held at the AGO's FRANK restaurant, at approximately 7 p.m.

The invite is posted above. Please RSVP to friendsofcatherine@rogers.com by July 20.

If you would like to forward the invite to anyone you know who might be interested in attending, please let me know at scott.henderson@rogers.com and I will send it to you as an attachment.

Additionally, we will be reading out anecdotes and memories from Catherine's friends and co-workers that have been posted to this blog and elsewhere. If you have a memory to share, please post it here and we will try to include as many as possible.

Looking For Your Memories...

Hi Friends of Catherine

As you know, planning for our arts and culture style memorial are starting to come together for July 22nd (thanks Scott!!). We will have our DVD photo tribute of Catherine's life on display once again. I would like to add your favourite photos of Catherine as I know there are parts of her life that I did not capture. I would especially like to include more photos of CC and her art and her time in Kingston. If you have any photos that you would like me to include, please email to bkubilius@acanac.net

Thanks, Barb